That Ugly Monster, Pain
(c) 2019 Linda M. Rhinehart Neas
According to studies gathered by the Center for Disease Control (CDC) in 2016, 20.4% of Americans suffered from Chronic Pain. That means one in every five people has chronic pain from one source or another.
Chronic pain is caused from various conditions - disease, trauma, environment. Living with it is hell.
Most people with Chronic Pain look healthy. Many of them appear to go through their day happy and content. Usually, if you ask, they will tell you they are fine. They tell the medical community that they "have a high pain tolerance." This means that they have learned to live with Chronic Pain; therefore, until the pain reaches unbearable, they just keep moving forward.
People who live with this condition begin and end every day in pain. Their days look something like this:
Upon waking, they can't loll around in bed. The weight of the sheets and blankets hurts. Their joints are on fire. The attempt to stand up takes strength as their knee and hip joints feel as if they have fused overnight. A hot shower helps get things moving so that they can begin their day. Getting in and out of the car sends shots of pain up and down their body. Too long a drive causes their knees, hips, elbows and shoulders to freeze up making it very painful to move. If they work, they face multiple challenges. Take the elevator or walk the stairs? Walking helps keep their joints from freezing, but it is a painful act. Some days being better than others, many opt for a slow ascent up the stairs. What you don't use, you lose, right?! In work, they must keep for being in one position for too long. Sometimes coworkers think they just don't want to work because they appear to be leaving their work area to "walk around." Shaking hands can cause searing pain in the hand joints. Some people think people who refuse a handshake are unfriendly, so those with Chronic Pain often smile through the pain. By the end of the day, getting in the car to return home should be a welcome relief but by that time every part of their body is screaming. Once home, they keep moving...keep bending, stretching, walking...it's like they are trying to outrun the pain. Actually, they know that once they stop, the exhaustion from being in pain all day will hit them and their body will simply shut down. Many people with Chronic Pain fall asleep in their chairs at night. If they wake, there is the painful challenge to rise from the position they are in to walk to their bed. Then, slowly lie down in order to try to go back to sleep for the remainder of the evening. Unfortunately, at this point, their pain level is so high that even though they may appear to sleep, their bodies do not go into REM. They do not get the rest they need. They wake with their body aching and their mind foggy. Fatigue is also a constant companion.
Chronic Pain is a real medical condition. People who have it don't usually have any outward signs of it. They cannot control it. They have good days and bad days based on the weather, their environment, their stress level and the amount of moving they do. Simple tasks like spring cleaning, doing laundry or shopping for groceries can send them into a tailspin of exhaustion and pain.
Don't expect everyone with Chronic Pain to tell you they are having problems. Many don't. Society has made them feel like failures because they can't keep up with expectations. Many people with Chronic Pain will push themselves until they literally can't move, or their immune systems crash from the wear and tear of "pushing through the pain."
One thing is for certain. People with Chronic Pain are not lazy, uncaring, or irresponsible. They are, most often, doing the best they can and a lot more than some people who have no pain.
Bottom line: don't judge people simply because they don't look sick. There are many invisible diseases and conditions in the world today. Take the time to mindfully look beyond the facade. Look into people's eyes with compassion. Almost always, you will see the truth.
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